Reproductive Rights, Abortion, In the Name of the Father.

· Personal Views

One of the things that has always perplexed me in the argument over abortion is the claim made by women to say, “unless you have a woman’s reproductive parts, you should keep your f**in mouth shut about her reproductive rights”.

While I certainly support the right of any human to exercise total authority over their own body, even to include suicide, the fact of pregnancy involves two entities – the developing fetus, and the Father.  Yes, I said it.  I went there.  The Father!

Not all of the other 50% of the progenitors of our species are in the class of “lights out and I’ll be gone before the sun comes up”.  In my own life, I’ve impregnated two women years prior to meeting my now ex-wife.  In both cases, I feel I was denied my right to keep my unborn children, but I’m rational enough to acknowledge that it’s complicated.

If I had my way, and we had the technology, I would have had the developing fetus removed and placed in a laboratory environment.  The mother would have signed away any and all rights to the child the same as she would if she were to place her child up for adoption.

If you think about it, the procedure of abortion involves about the same effort and invasion of a woman’s body to permanently halt the development of the fetus, as it would be to remove that fetus and keep it in an artificial environment where it can complete its development to a point where it is considered alive by the law.  This is, of course, assuming a human can legally be brought from conception to legal life in a laboratory environment.

Who knows what my life may have been as a single father.  I was certainly too young and immature to be a parent.  But is anybody really mature enough to be a parent?  I’ve seen incredibly mature young parents, and in incredibly stupid older parents.  In my case, I guess we’ll never know.  In both cases I was denied my right to find out.

While I respect a woman’s right to make decisions concerning her own body, in the cases of pregnancy, I think the rights of the Father need to at least be considered.  Her rights should not trump his rights.  And his rights should not trump her rights.  There is a solution for both.  Science has the answer, if the religious zealots would just get out of the way.

Of course, my views have nothing to do with the rights of a male perpetrator over his victim in the case or rape, incest, or pedophilia.  Let’s just be clear about that.  I’m talking about a pregnancy that is the result of a legally consensual sexual encounter.

This is my personal view.


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  1. raisingheathens

    The reason the man gets no say is that it isn’t his body being used as an incubator.

    If the science were up to the task of what you discussed above, I would agree that there could be a reasonable expectation on the father’s part to get a say. But since it isn’t, giving the man a say has to be done by taking away the woman’s right to control her own body.

    I understand that this fact makes the arrangement seem unfair, and yet, how would it be more fair? It would be unfair for him to get 50% of the say when she has to handle 100% of the pregnancy, should it continue. Shouldn’t a man be required to find a woman who *wants* his child, if he is looking to reproduce? if one is adamantly opposed to a fetus with his genetic material being aborted, he should be careful to address what the woman would do if an accidental pregnancy were to occur, and he should find out this info before they do the deed. I get it, this isn’t a very romantic concept to address in advance if it was, say, a fling, or a one-nighter. but if you choose to wing it and ignore the fact that she has bodily autonomy and may not make the decision you agree with, you will have to accept whatever she decides to do. (incidentally, I also think it’s wise of a woman to ascertain where a man stands on abortion so that she can avoid any awkward unpleasantness if an accident should occur, but either way, she will have the last say. I just think it’s smart to take proactive steps against a big crazy argument, and doubly smart not to tangle naughty bits with people whose beliefs are incompatible with your own.)

    In the U.S., even a person who is braindead or recently dead is not allowed to have his or her organs donated to save the life of another. We prioritize the rights of a corpse’s bodily autonomy even over the life of a fully grown human, and yet some believe that a fetus should be prioritized over the woman’s rights.

    I’m not so extreme that I would say it is fair. I get that it’s unfair. it’s also unfair that women are stuck carrying the babies, but that’s the way the cookie crumbled, and until the technology is far more advanced, it will have to remain unfair.

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